Art of Communicating With Your Child
Dear Parent,
A good start is half work done: Talk to your child and discover Fun!!
To effectively communicate, we must realize that we are all different in the way we perceive the world and use this understanding as a guide to our communication with others. The same thing you can read in the story below.
I ran into a stranger as he passed by “Oh, Excuse me Please” was my reply.
He Said, Please Excuse me too, I wasn’t watching for you.
We were very polite, this stranger and I; we went on my way and said good bye.
But at home a different story is told how we treat our loved one’s young and old.
Later that day cooking the evening meal my son stood beside me with great zeal.
When I turned I nearly knocked him down “move out of the way” I said with a frown. He walked away his little heartbroken, I didn’t realize how harshly I’d spoken.
While I lay awake in bed, God’s still small voice came to me and said, “While dealing with the stranger common courtesy you use, but the family you love you seem to abuse. Go and look on the kitchen floor, you will find some flowers there by the door. Those are the flowers he brought for you. He picked them himself Pink, Yellow and Blue.
He stood very quietly not to spoil the surprise you never saw the tears that filled his little eyes.”
By this time I felt very small and now my tears began to fall. I quietly went and knelt by his bed “Wake up little one wake up” I said. “Are these the flowers you picked for me?”
He smiled “I found them out by the tree” I picked them because they were pretty like you. I knew you’d like them specially the blue.
I said “Son I am very sorry for the way I acted today, I shouldn’t have yelled at you that way” He said “Oh Mom! That’s Okay, I love you anyway”
I said “Son I love you too I do like the flowers specially the blue”.
“The mouth is made for communication, and nothing is more articulate than a kiss.”
The word communication comes from the Old French word which means common. When we communicate we share something common; information, emotion, ideas, thoughts, expression and meaning. The most important is what you intend, comes later but what you speak can either mend or damage the relationship.
Good communication is the life saviour and growth for your child especially at times of high stress — it may work as a healer.
How carefully do we choose the words in a conversation with our children?
Do we really examine the nature of the questions and the effects of positive and negative statements?
The pitch, speed, quality and volume of our voice contribute to our verbal communication. And our facial expressions, postures, gestures, body language contributes to our non-verbal communication. It is essential to understand that the art of communication solves most of our problems more effectively. It means that we should learn to pay more attention as to how we quote statements and make use of the right words to build a better emotional connection with your little ones.
How to connect:
1.) Train your child to read your body language.
2.) While listening, gently nod your head up and down.
3.) Always keep a moderate tone of speaking.
4.) Touch therapy plays an important role while discussing something intense.
5.) Children usually understand the language of love.
6.) Pay attention to the conversation with your child.
7.) Teach yourself to smile.
8.) Be willing to admit your own mistakes.
9.) Maintain a sense of privacy between you and your child.
10.) Allow your child for emotional outburst while expressing.
11.) Be free with hugs and other tactile signs of affection.
These above exercises are all designed to support our development as a communicator.
The enthusiasm and practice of our communicating skills, will determine the effect we can have on our child’s mind set.
It is better to bind your child with good communication skills and by gentleness, than by fear.
For a family to function effectively there must be times when unfettered communication can take place and the shared meal is an ideal opportunity. Eating in front of the TV or at different times and places is a lost opportunity for family building.
As parents we must promise to ourselves to dine together and create a positive environment by lighting candles and discuss issues without anger or recrimination or recourse to negative emotion. This is a long term communication strategy.
Communication opens the door of rigid thoughts and makes it flexible. Embrace this positive change as change embrace us.
Feelings of worth can flourish only in an atmosphere where individual differences are appreciated, mistakes are tolerated, communication is open, and rules are flexible the art of communication magically shrinks the gap between two individuals that is found in a nurturing family.
